Forest Rush
by Mrs.Mellark101
Summary: Pre-epilogue Mockingjay. When Peeta comes home to District 12 and tries to reconcile with Katniss. (A prequel to; The Wedding That Took a De-Tour)
1. New Hostility

A prequel to; _The Wedding That Took a De-Tour_

CHAPTER ONE - NEW HOSTILITY

"Ouch!" I squirm around in the chair as Greasy Sae attempts to brush my hair.

"If you would stop acting like a five-year old for one minute, we might get somewhere." She tuts and I growl again, crossing my arms over my chest... exactly like a tantrum-throwing five-year old.

She gets through the last knot and sighs; relieved. She pulls a mirror out from the cupboard - where I had intended it to stay hidden - and shows me. "You want to braid it?" She says.

"Maybe another day." I scowl and take the blurry mirror back to the cupboard. Once safely out of sight, I told Sae she could leave if she wanted to. She doesn't have to spend the whole day trying to make me happy. No-one can accomplish that. Not even...

* * *

I usually spend the day staring at a wall or stopping Buttercup from eating away another piece of clothing. But today is different. There is new hostility in the air, God knows where from. I wonder up to a spare bedroom on the second floor and gaze out the window. The blood-red curtains are shut, leaving only a tiny crevice for me to peek through. Any more light will either blind or burn me.

I look upon Haymitch's house, then the rest of the empty houses along Victor's Village. What a waste of space. I turn my gaze to something more alive - the rest of District 12. It is a quiet day, but still more alive than Victor's Village. A few people bustle about, trying to cope with burdens galore. I hear a Capitol train come and rest in the station and I almost start to cry. It's just a train. But all the same - anything Capitol haunts me. The station gates open, and three or four figures tumble out. They'll probably pick up or drop off something then leave. No-one stays here by choice if they didn't come from here originally. Not even Capitol citizens want to visit 'The Girl On Fire's birth place.

The figures haul giant packages over their backs, except for one. One keeps walking, towards 12's civilization. I open the curtains a crack more, rub dust off the window, and squint.

No. It can't be. But it is.

I knew this would happen though - it had to happen some time.

Peeta is home.


	2. Questions

**A/N:**

**In this chapter I'm using some quotes from Mockingjay, when Peeta first returns to 12. I don't want to change much about the book - just fill in the gaps. Quotes from page 446.**

* * *

CHAPTER TWO - QUESTIONS

"You're back." I squeak out, now realising his presence drew me to my front garden.

"Dr Aurelius wouldn't let me leave the Capitol until yesterday." His eyes look vaguely empty, and for a fleeting second I put myself in his place - tortured and all. "By the way," He continues; "he said to tell you he can't keep pretending he's treating you forever. You have to pick up the phone."

I ponder on these words before noticing what I interrupted him doing. He's holding a wheelbarrow. How long did it take me to walk down the stairs? "What are you doing?"

"I just picked these form the edge of the woods a few minutes ago. For Prim. I thought we could plant them along the side of the house." I stare at the plants in the wheelbarrow. Roses. But not the evil President Snow kind - Primrose. I sigh, then look back to Peeta.

After not doing much for what? - A few months now? This is too much - seeing Peeta, being reminded of Prim, living itself...I run back inside and camp on the sofa, smothering myself in three thick blankets.

When I am disturbed, I'm far from impressed. "Katniss? Are you awake?"

"I am now." I growl and chuck a pillow at the source.

I pull one of the blankets down just enough for my eyes to see the intruder. Immediately I soften.

"Sorry," He says, slightly coldly. "just came by to drop off dinner. Sae thought I could do it, since it's my first time seeing you in a while."

"Peeta..." I sit up slowly and try not to make my stale appearance too obvious - the same clothes I left the Capitol in, yet again mangled hair, most likely blotchy face and tearing skin.

"It's fine. I'll just drop it off and go. I might see you tomorrow." He strides out of the room and a few seconds later I hear the door slam.

After the encounter I feel slightly empty; firstly because it's clear that the Peeta I knew has gone, and secondly because I don't know what brought me to treat Peeta (old or new Peeta) like that. Even if it was just a few words. I stumble off to the kitchen where Peeta left dinner. He obviously left the dinner before he himself left, because there is note with it.

_Katniss,_

_I'm back finally! Hope we can be friends._

_Peeta_

I don't know whether to feel as if I'm a dumpee being reduced to a friend rank - or a cold dumper who's being asked to tie up loose ends. I fold the note and toss it in the bin before starting on tonight's meal - a simple tomato soup. I know that since everyone's been back there have been a few booming businesses made out of growing food in gardens, but this is the first time I've had some of the business' produce. It's a good meal, but I never eat much and a lot is wasted on me. I wonder if Peeta would want some, but he probably had some from Greasy Sae too. I decide to go anyway, since he is only three doors down. Before though, I simply have to do something about my clothes. I don't know how Sae let me practically live in these clothes for months on end.

I peel off the clothes painfully, avoiding all mirrors. I don't want to see my new skin just yet. Then I take a shower. But the shampoo smells like roses, and soon I'm slipping everywhere and breathing in the wretched scent. Elbowing the glass door open, I collapse onto the bathroom floor and begin panting heavily. I start to panic, and crawling back to the shower I switch it off. I take the shampoo bottle and throw it out the next room's window. I have not been into the bathroom's adjoining room before. It is a small, quaint bedroom - with a vase containing three white roses. I take the roses and tear apart their petals. My next victim is the vase. I smash it against the wall, and then pieces at a time I throw them out the window. My hands start to bleed from the shard's corners, and I eventually am sprawled across the floor, wet and a bit bloody.

Bloods fogs my vision. It is on my face and slowly entering my eyes. I am dizzy. I hear footsteps. A gasp. Running. More running. A tale for when I am capable of telling it.

I should've known that throwing things out the window wouldn't go unnoticed. Of course, Peeta happened to be sitting on the wall outside his house when he heard smashing and dropping. so he came to check on me. Even after the games, Peeta respects my modesty - so got Sae. He didn't leave me though - he shouted out the window until someone came out. He tried moving away some pieces of the vase, but luckily Sae came soon enough. She sent him out and she tended to me.

"You're stubborn you know." She said as soon as I regained consciousness. I feel surges of pain as I realise she's taking fragments out of my arm. She has covered my naked body with a towel, and has laid all the other broken pieces on another towel.

I see the door creak slightly open, and Peeta peeks through.

"Is she any better?" He whispers, and I close my eyes.

"I'm still taking out the pieces. Not much can be done, honestly. Can you get me a wet towel? I want to start dabbing the wounds."

"Ok, sae. You might as well be a doctor." He jokes whilst reaching into the bathroom.

"It's all just common sense, Peeta." I guess she makes a shooing sort of movement, or signals for him to leave, because I open my eyes and he's creeping out again. He, who seemed at least a bit like the normal Peeta.

"That boy will save you again one day. He's got a kind heart, even after..." She trails off, and goes back to my arm, which seems to have suffered most. I look down myself to see quite a bit of blood. Peeta left the wet towel on my leg, which must be bad because it was too numb to even feel the towel being laid down. My free arm has just one lone scratch, and judging by the pain - my face has a lot of marks.

"Thank you." Is all I manage.

A few hours later she leaves, leaving me in the bedroom, wearing too many plasters to count and warm, clean clothes. I never got a chance to see my awful, new skin. That's for another day. I tread downstairs to the kitchen, hoping for the fridge to be stocked, when I see Peeta. He doesn't notice me, since his back is turned, and he is humming a sad tune - slow, deep and mournful. He seems to be making something, with a bowl containing what I hope is food.

I quietly sit down at the table, and he still doesn't notice. Just a minute later he turns, probably to get another ingredient, and he drops his whisk.

"Oh, sorry, I didn't realise you were down." He says, picking up the whisk.

"It's ok. I like company that doesn't make me talk." I laugh quietly at the end, then when the room fills with silence I continue; "Smells good. What is it?"

"Olive bread." He replies, turning back to the mixture. He picks up the bowl and sets it on the table I am at. He takes out the dough and starts to knead it on the table. "Since you were, uh, up there, I thought I would make you something."

"Thank you. Really. I was feeling hungry actually." I smile at him, and it becomes sufficiently awkward.

He continues kneading as he says; "You know, I've been thinking. Maybe not yet, but it's been a while. Could we maybe, once a week or something, have like, uh..."

"Spit it out." I raise my eyebrows.

"Like therapy sort of? I guess. We could do the real or not real thing again. I just want to ask questions, but I don't think it would be fair on you to say them all at once." He stops kneading and I take in what he said. This is definitely old Peeta, thinking of how I would feel before his own feelings.

"Peeta, I..." What words can I use to tell him no? All I want is to be myself. Before he came I was doing fine with not coping.

"You don't have to right now or anything. Just, ever?"

"Sure. When did you have in mind?" I try not to grit my teeth as I say this, but he brightens up, like he's almost happy.

"Maybe I can ask one or two...tonight?" He says tonight as if he's just invited himself to stay for a lot longer, but I skim over that.

I don't answer, but stand up and walk to the counter where he had the bowl a few minutes ago. Sae stacked the letters up here today, because she was complaining that she kept tripping over them every time she walked in the door.

I sift through them until I find the one's from Peeta. In total I find eight.

"I've got a few of my own questions too."


	3. Answers

CHAPTER THREE - ANSWERS

_Katniss,_

_So I'm in the Capitol. Dr A told me to write letters to you but I thought it was stupid. I told him I wasn't going to, but let's face it, it probably isn't that stupid. _

_I don't really know what to think, because I have so many questions only you can answer. I tried asking Haymitch a few, but he only answered his phone once and he was drunk. They told me he ripped his phone out of the wall again. _

_I'm starting to get these memories from years and years ago, like when I was ten or something. Just glances of you really. but I don't know if they're real. They feel so precious, I want them to be real. Are they?_

_Please answer when Dr A calls you next time._

_Thanks, really._

_Peeta_

I read it quickly while Peeta takes his olive bread out of the oven. He sets it on the table and uses his hand to swipe away the steam. He then takes out a chopping board I didn't know I had, and puts the bread on that. In small, swift movements he cuts even slices. Steam clouds rise from each slice and when he's done he organises them in a circle on the edge of the plate. He takes out a tiny bowl and butter, and dollops a heap of the creamy substance into the bowl and steadys it in the middle of the bread. He picks up the plate and a knife and leads me into the living room. I follow suit, astounded at how quick, planned and precise his work is.

He sits down on the sofa and beckons me to sit next to him. I agree silently and sit awkwardly on the end of the sofa.

"We can talk first." He says, "The bread will take a while to cool down."

"Ok." I whisper, and we sit in silence for what seems like forever.

"I'll start then." I nod stiffly, and wait. "Where do I begin? When I first went to the Capitol, everyone was telling me how lucky I was. To be alive, to know you, to love you, to be loved by you. But I didn't feel lucky. After everything...I wanted death. Or to talk to you. But you never answered your phone."

"So I'm the equivalent of death am I?"

"That's not what I meant-"

"Peeta. It's ok." I laugh, and loose some tension in my muscles.

"Right. Ok. So yeah...Dr Aurelius would always ask me these questions about how I felt about you. I didn't really know. But I want to know what I used to feel. Was I in love with you? Was it all an act? Did I even like you? I think I did, but..."

"Ok. You liked me. Before the first games we never spoke but you said you loved me before the games. You saw me. You knew me. Do you know the story of you with the bread?" I laugh at the thought of the Capitol changing that memory, but then I could've changed it.

"Yeah, I do."

"Well yeah. I think you did it because you loved me. The whole love thing for the games was your idea anyway. I think you loved me."

He takes a while to digest it all, but then he asks; "Did you love me?"

When I reluctantly agreed to all this, this question was the one I wanted to avoid nearly most of all. Why? Because I don't know. Through the whole thing I was nearly completely unsure. Love wasn't my favourite topic, but I loved his company like you love a friend. Whether it was ever more...

"Honestly? Maybe. Probably. Once. I don't know. Too much has happened for me to remember or know, or anything. I'm sorry, but that's not exactly my ideal question. I was prepared to marry you, yeah, but I had to. I wasn't the most unfortunate person in the world, and I could've got someone a whole lot worse. But it doesn't matter, does it? It'd be impossible for you to love me now, wouldn't it?"

"Love is an exciting thing. Anything could happen. But thanks. It felt like I loved you, but I wasn't sure. It felt like you loved me too."

At this last comment I freeze. I gulp to keep silent and stare straight ahead of me. He doesn't pry anymore, but eventually he asks;

"So what do you want to ask me?"

It all comes out in a rush; "I'm fine tonight, honestly. It can wait. A few days probably more. How about then? Or anytime really? Maybe you should go now, I mean...yeah." He looks a bit confused but stands up anyway.

I walk him to the door and he waves goodbye. I slowly close the door as he walks away into the early evening. We never touched the bread. I never asked my questions. I never told him that I had so badly wanted to open his letters and call him and tell him I missed him and wanted him to be home and how I wanted the old him back and could I have him back and could he love me so I'm not alone. Most of all I want him to tell me he loves me, even if he doesn't love me.

"I'm so sorry." I whisper and a single teardrop makes its way down my face. I lean against the door and slide down it, fearing any future communication with Peeta. I don't want to know a Peeta that doesn't love me. I want him to love me so I can fall in love and it'll be ok.

But he's not the old Peeta. This one has been through so much.

Too much.

* * *

**A/N:**

**Hi guys! Hope you're liking the story so far. There's a song that gave me a lot of inspiration for this; ****_The Weekend - Wicked Games_****. I prefer the cover by ****_Coeur De Pirate _****(****_Pirate Heart_**** in English), which is the one I listened to for this chapter. If you want to co-write any chapters just tell me in a review or PM, I'd be happy to as right now I have literally nothing planned ahead. Which I shoudln't be telling readers but hey...**

**Keep reading!**

**-Angeline**


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